Stranger to Azeroth

March 5th, 2010

It never ceases to amaze how much people end up treating you like actual strangers once you leave the game. This’ll be the third time I’ve left World of Warcraft due to the stupidity of the player base. You raid with the big guys who are all about progression… then you are stuck having to put up with their asshatery (and yes, it’s a word :P). Then you try to raid with people who are “casual”, and you end up banging your head against the keyboard due to frustration. There is no such thing as a middle ground!

What was the final straw this time was putting up with a healer that has a healing alt of pretty much EVERY healing class. He seems to think that he’s some sort of healing god and always finds fault with the other healers when he is consistently the lowest healer on the meter for every raid. Why is it that he’s the first to start barking out that healing is the issue when it’s him that is partially to blame for the wipe? o_O I’ll never understand that. A few times, I’d subtly mention that healing is NOT the issue and it goes ignored. He also plays a few DPS classes and even when he does that, he’s ALWAYS finding fault with the healing! Every wipe is the healers fault… noooooo, NOT because we’re ~80k DPS below what is needed in order to beat the enrage timer. Nope! No siree bob! It’s the healers. Always the healing. Outside of him and maybe two other healers, I thought the healing was great! We were healing and keeping up most of the raid. He was typically assigned to being a tank healer… but was he healing the tanks? I dunno… because the tanks would literally drop the moment I switched and started trying to heal the raid. Why is that? Sincerely baffles me.

Then you have the taunt tard jackasses who always have to taunt off of the tank currently tanking it. Why? Epeen? I dunno. Either way, my husband’s tank would just tank using his moves and y’know, saves his taunt ability for when a careless DPS’er over-aggro’s… or a free add runs loose and is attacking the healers. He saves it for those very moments because that’s what responsible tanks are SUPPOSED to do, right? RIGHT? /facepalm  It never ceases to amaze me how arrogant tank players tend to be. It also amazes me that my husband loves playing the tanking class and isn’t arrogant. Every other tank that I’ve seen in any other raid/guild are typically the most arrogant jackasses I’ve ever met in the game. Go figure. =_=;

Anyways, this is perhaps the first out of three times quitting that I’ve quit before my anger gets the best of me… or so I think. We haven’t /gquit due to the nonsense that the raid/guild leader starts accusing us of. Typically, the raid leader will start belittling you to being unnecessary anyways; say stuff such as “We don’t need you anyways” and that we were there stealing their epics from them when you were probably one of the better players in the raid. (and I said ONE OF the better… not the best or near the best. We don’t like to be carried and perform the best we’re capable of.) Or they just start using real life situations against you and pretty much broadcast it to the entire guild/raid. -_-; Why? Because they can’t use us anymore to gain more epics? I don’t really get it. Even though we feel we’re leaving on semi-decent terms with the guild, we’re suddenly being snubbed and given the cold shoulder by just about everyone. It could just all be in my head playing it out, but even my husband is feeling it. It’s just that sense of “well, you’re no longer any use to us, so see ya” or something to that degree.

The first time we quit on our original server for about a year, when we came back… everyone we were grouping/raiding with didn’t even remember us! :\ I was like… wow… ok, I see how things are. -_-; No wonder none of them returned emails either. I even had one of them on my facebook account and would send him messages there and he’d never respond to them. I guess that really sealed the deal about “friendships” in game. I should know better by now. *sigh* I mean he even came so far to visiting us and staying at our house for a week! We visited him when we went down to So. Cal for Christmas in 2006, too! :( I guess most “friendships” in WoW don’t last past the professor plums (aka epic loot).

Maybe I’m just being all emo about something stupid, but considering the fact that I’ve only stayed in contact with ONE player from WoW (who doesn’t even play anymore either) … makes you begin to see and realize who really does want to be friends with you and who are really just there to use you and your characters for their own needs in the game. Nobody really actually wants to connect with one another and be friends. Why is that? Seriously… one friend? Out of how many have I played together with? It’s rather depressing. I honestly try to make real actual friends and am honest about it when I chat with people. Maybe perhaps a bit TOO honest and vent my frustrations to them and go overboard at times, but they also do it to me every so often, and I feel wanted and needed when they do! I feel honored when they can come to me and be able to talk to me openly about something troubling them… because then that means they trust me, right?

I’m first to admit that I’ve never been any good at this friendship thing. As I’ve ranted in the past, I don’t have any of those childhood friends that most people I see have. I don’t have any family that I remain in touch with that I grew up with. I don’t have any of that. I was always the one teased and made fun of on both sides… so I don’t know what it’s like to have that sort of bond with people. I’m horrible at people skills and I am well aware of this. But because of all of this, I’m also extremely paranoid and defensive about where my standing is. I’m not a backstabber or a two-faced hypocrite. I don’t tell somebody not to do something and then go and happily do it myself. I don’t go and spread stuff around or call people out on it publicly or “air out dirty laundry” for everyone else to see. If somebody trusts me with something, I will keep it with me and well, my husband usually finds out eventually… but he’s the most quiet guy you’ll ever meet. He rarely talks to me. I mean if you’ve seen the movie called “UP”… he’s kinda like that old guy. :P “You don’t talk very much, do ya? I like you!” is kind of how I felt. :P  lol. Anyways, when I rant and vent to somebody, I trust them… but 90% of the time, that trust is betrayed. Why is that?

I think I’ll never truly understand people. Why do people bother using other people and then treat them like strangers when they decide to take an extended break? I’m tired of the headaches I’m getting and putting up with unnecessary belittling from the worst performers in the guild/raid. Perhaps that’s my ego kicking in when a bad performer belittles me, but I really don’t see where they feel they can get off with that sort of treatment and continue doing it. It’s not like it just happened a couple times… it happens pretty much EVERY raid I’ve gone on with them! So for nearly 2.5 months, it’s been this way! I’m tired of it! And he’s this old man, so at the same time I feel I must respect his age and not throw it back at him… grr, silly morals kicking in. :( So instead, we’re going to take an extended break and try to maybe see if things have changed in a few months. Maybe they will, maybe they won’t. Either way, I’m tired of the unnecessary stress and frustration. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t so high-strung and easily agitated… then stuff like this wouldn’t bother me so much, but I am. It’s who I am… and I gotta just cope with it. Bleh.

Perhaps it’s best I just stick to console gaming… just my husband and I alone. :\ That way, when I know I failed, I failed because of my own shortcomings/lack of knowledge/skill… not being blamed by some under-performing healer. Either way, I wish the cold shoulder snubbing would stop. I wish I could just make more actual friends who just like you as a person rather than use your toon to gear up theirs. -_-;